Opening Lines In Action

In the previous lesson (& I do apologize for how long ago that’s been) I discussed the opening line. In this column I’ll give some real anecdotal evidence.

This first example will illustrate 2 principles. Take advantage of the surroundings to engage a woman in conversation & I used humor to make the dialogue more relaxed. (Actually since I applied the 2^nd principle, I gave the green light for the further interaction. More on reading the signals in the next column.)

I was in Neiman Marcus trying on sunglasses. A man adjacent to me was engaged in the same task. He turned & asked my opinion on his considerations. I commented that it was hard to tell with a price tag hanging on his face. We both laughed & I helped him choose his glasses which gave us a chance to connect & touch.

The next incident applies the key: COMPLIMENT US.

I wear a lot of hats. I love them because you never have a bad hair day. Men have often begun a dialogue with me by complimenting or commenting on my chapeau. It warms me up. If I’m interested (& that is dependent how original the compliment is; we’re not talking a quick, “nice hat,” comment) we’re off & running.

Scenario 3 makes use of: MAKE AN OBSERVATION.

I was in a NY pizzeria alone 1 Saturday afternoon. I typically read or write when dining alone. A man at a nearby table noted the title of the book (which I have long since forgotten) & opened with a specific question that required more than a yes or no answer. Take note: Here’s another KEY -- if your opening line is in the form of a question make sure it genders more dialogue than a yes or no response. From his question it was apparent that he’d actually read the book. I find men who read more than the sports page to be promising.) This led to a thought provoking dialogue. While he & I did not connect beyond this; it was a pleasant diversion, company & cost both of nothing.

Scenario 4: DISARM US WITH HUMOR

One of my favorite opening lines wasn’t really an opening line at all but a pantomime. I was seated at a window table in a restaurant with a male companion. (Warning: Amateurs do not try this... Trolling for a woman in the company of another man whose status you don’t know, takes great skill to avoid physical injury.)

There was a knock at the window & there stood a famous comedian gesturing towards me. He mimed taking an arrow through his heart at the sight of me. I laughed & nodded my head in appreciation. He then continued to entertain us with other sight gags. He then came to our table & joined us. Yes, he was a famous comedian & that moved him from strange nut to confident celebrity. He sat down next to my guy friend (I was out on a date but our deal had not been sealed yet) & apologized to him. Wanted to let him know how lucky he was to be seen with me. There was something very tender & sweet in his comic vulnerability as he looked at me across the table & said, “After I saw you, I couldn’t risk never running in to you again. I had to take the shot.” His act of sheer courage & bravado is the stuff of movie scenes & 20 years later both my friend & I still recall this meeting.

So gentleman, I’ve given you food for thought. Let’s see how memorable you can be.

*** Bookmark me: my next topic will be: Reading the signals!

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